Okay. Now, when I say "Should i?" type questions, I'm not referring to serious life-changing decisions such as reaching out to estranged family, vetting a serious relationship, getting a divorce, having an unplanned pregnancy, a life-altering country or job change, or something where experienced feedback is actually somewhat valuable. I am specifically referring to trivial shit you don't need the advice or permission of internet randoms to make a decision on. You're a man, make your own fucking decions on trivial choices.
After much thought, and seeing all the arguments for and against (content) moderating "should i?" type posts as seen in the original community discussion, I have seen arguments for allowing them with newbie psychology to support why they do and should be able to do it, and I've seen arguments on how it fosters a lack of accountability and an annoying front page spamming that discourages experienced users from participating.
There needs to be balance, if anything, for the newbie's on sake for experiencing actual long-term growth.
So, in light of not having the "lock post" function @redpillschool (if you can give me and everyone else that early Christmas present), I have a solution for "Should i?" posts. The only thing I haven't decided on is how to resolve it after someone hits maximum warnings. So again I am reaching out for community feedback.
My solution is to near-freely allow "Should i?" posts, but only allow so many from the same person, and if that person does it 3 times their 3rd post gets immediately taken down but they get a flair of shame. The flair t-list is as follows pic included:
1) Should i (x1)
2) Should i (x2)
3) Can't think for myself
The first two are self-explanatory. Ask such a trivial post and get a flair/warning. On the third one post comes down immediately and you get the flair of shame.
Now, I'm just unsure of how to devise the criteria to remove the flairs (particularly the flair of shame):
Go x amount of weeks without making such a post? Make an update post in which you made your own choice on the question and update on how it went? A personal mod DM appeal explaining in detail how you're going to fix your shit (books to read or have finished/ how you've since improved on your own?), a public post explaining in detail to the community how you're going to start being more self-determinent?
Discuss opinions on the decision as well as opinions of how to remove or downgrade the flairs once they've been applied.
First-light 1w ago
Yeah sounds a pretty good idea to move forward. You can always tweak it as you go. I would make the flair of shame quite easy to remove first go (week or two of sin bin) but repeat offenders get "unreformed askhole" flair for quite a while.
We don't want to be too fast to punish or we scare off guys who need help. New comers will need it explaining if they get flagged as asking too many "shoulds". Its not unreasonable for a newbie to arrive asking "should" and it would be best if his question was answered not slapped down first time. Its the regular offenders who have been warned kindly before...
I have noticed that forums have become a lot less generous to questioners in recent years. "Go do your own research" is said a lot more these days. Here its "read the sidebar" Within limits punishment is the right answer for people who do no homework and we do need to help people to not be spinless fools asking random internet strangers to answer questions they alone can answer. If punishment is taken too far it tends to lead to a clique developing where the in crowd piss on incomers who are a bit different or a bit less experienced.
Its a balancing act but trialling flairs of shame seems worth a go when there are quite a lot of spergy questions coming form a number of regular offenders. I thin it probably does need more mod input rather than less to explain the situation to the offender and coach him out of it not just shame confused newcomers into going elsewhere.
Vermillion-Rx Admin 1w ago
Good points. I was not planning on insta-flairing new regs anyway.
I think people are so hostile to "should i?" Questions because 90% of the time it is something found in the sidebar or terms glossary or they should just go for it and not care if they get rejected.
Nearly all the trivial ones are easily solved by just doing the thing, not not doing the thing.
And that's without reading rational male, even though reading that would likewise answer a ton of their questions.
Yup, and they know it. So they gotta really bank their limited chances to ask such a question and probably put a ton of work into wording their question to avoid a flair (spoiler: that won't work) and hopefully answer their question by having to try to avoid an easy flair. Plus, they will probably save it more for trivial shit that is more important than not but the flair risk still might encourage them to answer it on their own
I still have the original askhole flair in settings even though it's been retired. Since I'll be taking down should i posts that hit 3x anyway they shouldn't need it. No one will see what they asked unless they have speedy eyes but they'll still have the flair "can't think for myself"
We'll see how this goes. I found this to be the only way that balanced freedom to sperg and be a newb with having posting standards
Overkill_Engine 2 1w ago
Or it's just blatant validation seeking for a decision they've clearly already made. It's hardly ever a "help me break down the pros and cons" but more a request for consensus/approval like they were a neurotic woman.
Vermillion-Rx Admin 1w ago
Pretty much this
Kreaton01 1w ago
Well, I feel like some newcomers definitely overpost on miniscule questions. Although, it's not always "should I?" questions.
I guess it's fair to discourage asking for holdouts on every decision. What do you think about obvious questions asked over and over again? I don't want to point fingers, but some users overdo asking for advice, and it feels like ranting/trying to socialize more than actual questions.
Vermillion-Rx Admin 1w ago
Should i questions are uniquely their own category of bad questions. Yes, they are often askhole questions but not every askhole asks them nor is every should I and askhole.
They have to be dealt with separately. They are bad, low effort posts regardless of askhole factor.
We used to do askhole flairs but newbies couldn't handle it. The flairs did shift the culture on AskTRP though and since point flairing experienced users with endorsement points, their telling men they are being askholes has largely also been effective. Askhole posts are also frequently parodied on the satire tribe so there is a much lower incentive to be an askhole than there used to be
Also, yes, a lot of AskTRPers use this is forum as a social media conversation, which is already against the AskTRP rules and i should enforce it more. They should be having more casual questions on TRP.red where such questions have no content violations
Typo-MAGAshiv 2 1w ago
I feel bullied.
Should I call out to Shrek?
Typo-MAGAshiv 2 1w ago
This flair change is bullying.
should I beseech Shrek for assistance?!
Musicgoon78 1 1w ago
Nice flair broseph! Should I get one myself?
Typo-MAGAshiv 2 1w ago
Looks like you did!
Should I be jealous that I'm no longer the only one?
No-Stress-Cat 1w ago
You guys are funny as shit LOL.