I was talking to this girl on the phone, and our conversation shifted to past experiences. She asked me if I had any stalkers in the past, and I said yes, the at one point, she joked that if her cat could talk, she’d be in trouble. I laughed, and she told me a story about male strippers, which I listened to without any judgment and even encouraged.
Later in the conversation, she mentioned the cat thing again, so I asked her, “What’s a story your cat would share that would get you in trouble?” She seemed surprised, got a bit awkward, and just said, “I don’t know.” I didn’t press and moved on to other topics.
Here’s the thing, I genuinely don’t judge and actually try to make it comfortable for women to share things openly; part of it because I myself have my own experiences. But it made me wonder: Why would she be surprised or awkward when I followed up on something she brought up herself? Do you think the way I asked made it feel more intense than it should have been? How do you usually navigate topics like this without making things weird?
First-light 6d ago
They love to let what is below the surface just show and then back off. They love to show the tip of the iceberg, they sometimes almost feel a need to air their dirty linen but they don't want you looking below the water.
If you see the tip of the iceberg, know there is a lot more there.
Remember that they like to tell you things when they are not on guard. If you get closer to them, they will clam up as they know you don't value a slut. They tell the most truths early on when un pushed. You just have to look t the tips and work out the rough dimensions of the iceberg below. You can't easily get them to reveal what they know devalues them, you have to get them wanting to confess and just make encouraging sounds as the story comes out. I think you did well to back off there when you did. You can always tell her the most embarrassing thing your pet has seen you do and then see if she returns with another story.
I have to say I have gone round to the slut's house and banged her on the sofa, stairs or floor and looked over the top of her at her pet as it watches unfazed as I thrust and she moans and thought "You have seen all this before haven't you?" (particularly true when the dog watches unfazed). Then you really know not to invest in this being your turn.
Mofreer 6d ago
Wouldn't a woman know that subtle hint would also devalue her as as slut because we could make our own presumption on her promiscuous past?
For instance when a woman tells me a half assed story or a hint like the cat one, I immediately assume she has had a promiscuous past