When it comes to courtship, women will often make men play the waiting game before she gives out sex. This is understandable, as a woman is going to want to make sure a man is willing to commit to her before she has sex with him. While we can debate how long this waiting period should be or what other circumstances should be accounted for, at the very least most men would at least want a woman to be consistent with her standards for how long she has a man wait before she sleeps with him. However, this consistency is lacking in a specific kind of woman who makes the man she wants a commitment from wait while she waves this waiting period entirely from a man that she has a strong sexual desire for but wants no commitment from. And these women will justify this inconsistency by saying that she does not care about the man who she only has sex with while she really wants to keep the one she makes wait, because she "cares about him more."
If this sounds insane, yep, you are right. Not only that, but women who enact this plan are guilty of fraud. What do I mean? The whole point of a woman having a waiting period before she has sex is supposed to be due to her not being someone that gives away sex so easily. Having a man wait implies "I am not easy to get into bed," but for a woman like this, it just means "I am going to make you wait an arbitrary amount of time because I want to give you the impression that I am not quick to give out sex, but in actuality I am. Just not for you."
There is no point to "building something slowly" if a woman is just going to be willing to give out sex to a man who did not provide any commitment in return. All it does is show that she thinks very little of the man she wants to make wait, because she is engaging in deceit and giving him a worse deal. And keep this in mind, women who do this claim that they really want these the long term commitment men ("claims"). Are such actions any way of demonstrating that a woman has any care for a man, or would you think that she is just engaging in deceptive manipulation to give off an impression of herself that is a falsehood?
If you are going to make a man wait, it better be for a good reason. Namely that you don't give out sex easily, and are completely consistent with that standard. So no one night stands or FWBs if you want to have a serious relationship, and most certainly not when you are wanting to start a serious relationship. Some women may claim that they are "no longer that kind of girl," but that is going to be a hard sell to get a guy to want to commit to a woman who is upping the price while making him wait longer. Was it really so crazy that historically most societies created restrictions when it came to sex? It really should not be all that surprising, as we are seeing exactly what happens when those rules are out.
Perhaps some women will pull the "I am no longer that kind of girl," but she cannot even do that in this case. Even outside of those cases, it is going to be a hard sell to get a guy to want to commit to a woman who is upping the price while making him wait longer. Was it really so crazy that historically most societies created restrictions when it came to sex? It really should not be all that surprising, as we are seeing exactly what happens when those rules are out.
Oddest-One-Here 9mo ago
Statement holds about as much credibility as claiming "I am no longer an alcoholic meth-head".
EurasianChad 12mo ago
Although I do agree, I notice I never take the women that sleep with me very fast as "relationship" material.
So its a tricky situation for them as well. Majority of the girls I meet sleep with me within 1-3 times meeting, but the faster it is, the more likely I am to assume she will do it with other chads, and therefore not worth considering for anything beyond a plate. I'm sure other men on the same belief system think the same.
Its completely unfair to the beta bux guy for a woman to market herself as a diamond when she's a pebble, and the only saving factor would be if she held it off with every dude as a matter of her value system/family raising.
Overkill_Engine Endorsed 12mo ago
What any intelligent man realizes it means:
"I still am that kind of girl, just not for you"
Can't imagine why a decent man would be insulted by and be averse to accepting that sort of offer.
There is no such thing as a Hoe Phase. You can't unfuck the football team ladies. You are forever a hoe.
houseoftolstoy Mod 12mo ago
Which is why I would never advocate for any man to marry such a woman. Along with that, he should make sure he does his best to figure out exactly what kind of woman his girlfriend is before he considers making any further commitment to her. At the very least, a man should do his best to prevent himself from committing to a woman who is unsuitable for marriage.
Boosted_Arrow 12mo ago
1000% This
Lone_Ranger 12mo ago
I think its even simpler than you suggest. You seem to suggest that if a woman is making you wait for sex, then its one of two things;
I think this is naive. At least, if you live in Europe or USA (the west). If a woman is making you wait, all that means is that she is not attracted to you at all. She is lining you up for beta bucks. You need to learn what women mean when they say 'husband material' - they mean a man that they are not sexually attracted to, but can be depended on. Depended on to provide, to give them a lifestyle that they would otherwise not have and to put up with their BS.
It's much simpler than you suggest - if a woman is making you wait, she is not sexually attracted to you. If she was, her panties would be coming off. That is how women are in the west. It's 2023. Women don't 'wait' for anything.
houseoftolstoy Mod 12mo ago
I am not going to give numbers for how many women are in category 1 or 2. Yes, the category 2 women are rare, but they do exist. I would not advocate for men to operate as if women are being upfront and honest when it comes to the beginning of relationships. You figure out over time if a woman is honest and consistent, as anyone who is a liar will not be able to keep up with their lies for very long. Then, once you have determined if a woman is honest enough do you move forward with any commitment.
Yes, if a woman makes you wait while she did not for others, she is indeed trying to cash out and probably does not feel sexual attraction for you. This is why I say any man who wants to try against all current odds to find a suitable wife-material woman needs to make sure he knows exactly what kind of woman he is dating before he makes any major decisions. Perhaps you in particular might say it is not worth trying to find a woman is is a genuine good girl. I do not blame you, and I will not attempt to convince you to try. But for those men who do want to try, I have attempted to provide some guidance to those sorts of men here:
https://www.reddit.com/r/WhereAllTheGoodMenAre/comments/gygbnj/a_psa_on_marriage/
Not saying it is perfect, and I want to emphasize that I am not telling men that they need to "man up and get married." Rather, I want men to know the risks and how much work they need to do if they want to attempt to seek out a marriageable woman.
Lone_Ranger 12mo ago
when I click on that link, it says that I have to apply to join, and membership pending.
category 2 may well exist, but they are vanishingly rare. They are as rare as hen's teeth. I don't think you will find one outside of a very religious community. That dosn't have wifi. Or access to the outside world. It's that rare.
I know of one particular woman that was like that. She was a vigin when she got married, and had two kids. But she moved to London. Beautiful indian woman. I ended up having a short affair with her while she was married. She confessed to me that she really hated being 'just a mum' and had fantasies of being a model. What she really meant was that she was jealous of the western women lifestyle.
It just doesn't work anymore this 'good girl routine'. Not in the west. You can go be a passport bro if you want and go find a conservative girl in the 3rd world, or you can try and find some virgin that grew up in some religious cult, but as soon as you remove the girl from the restrictive constraints of the community, they go all western.
I'm not advising men to do one thing or another -but I would be very very very sceptical of women that 'make you wait'. It's a sure sign that they are not attracted to you.
houseoftolstoy Mod 11mo ago
I did not realize they are gatekeeping those who do not have Reddit accounts. I will make sure this and other things I have written will be available here as well.
No-Stress-Cat 12mo ago
Watching the collapse of society is marvelous. Men are waking up, and no amount of makeup and filters are going to save these hoes. Men as a whole will be fine. Women on the other hand have righteously fucked themselves.
mattyanon 12mo ago
Specific kind of woman? Dude, this is ALL WOMEN.
Be careful here. Fraud has a specific meaning: "lying for financial benefit". If that's what you mean great, but don't throw the term around without reference to any form of financial benefit.
OP...... I really don't know what point you are making. The female alpha-fucks beta-bucks mating strategy is well known and all women do it.
woodsmoke Mod 11mo ago
I'm gonna' need you to take about 15 to 20% off the autism over there, Squirrely Dan.
Chaste women and those with integrity may be relatively rare but they do exist. I've known several in my life. Hell, I know several now. Could have married one when I was a young man, had I been so inclined.
houseoftolstoy Mod 12mo ago
We use all sorts of metaphorical language when it comes to the Sexual Marketplace. I think Marketplace also falls into that same category.
I am identifying the exact reason why women who engage in that strategy are guilty of wrongdoing. These women are selling themselves as "good girls" when they are not. Notice again the metaphor of the marketplace extending, where there are no literal sales being made, but the term is still used. So I think my use of "fraud" is quite fitting.
mattyanon 12mo ago
You may find it quite fitting.
The dictionary disagrees with you.
houseoftolstoy Mod 11mo ago
Please look up the definitions of metaphor and analogy. That might be helpful. Or do you think there is a literal marketplace when someone brings up the term Sexual Marketplace?
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nicknack 12mo ago
They are lying for financial benefit though. They are making it seem like they are something they are not to latch onto your finances and assets, and have someone support them and their future (or even existing) children.
It’s no difference than me faking pay slips and experience to get a job I’m not qualified for, or a loan I could never actually pay back.
Even in the very rare case that she doesn’t want something that leads to marriage, she’s still going to get free dinners, drinks, adventures, vacations, gifts if she becomes your ltr.
Women financially benefit greatly from being with someone, while on the other hand relationships cost men a lot of money.
mattyanon 12mo ago
In some cases yes, and let's call out those cases specifically: where the woman lies and stands to gain financially.
This isn't always the case for the "make him wait" strategy.
Yep.
Usually yes. I don't pay for women, but I know a lot of men do.