So i did a post about anxiety at the club when the friend isn't there, the advice was to stay there, acclimate, get used to the environment and deconstruct the idea that clubs are for cool people with friends and shit

I think i did well, the friend was there actually with all his crew of illegal immigrants, he wasn't like crazy high as fuck, he hooked up with a trashy girl from eastern europe

This made me think again about the fact is a mental state, he could be deported any time, doesn't really really have a house and hooked up with 3 chicks in 4 months, one of them hot... Meanwhile i was a bit moody, needed a drink and was self conscious at first, but I'm 35 and he's 24, i have bipolar and he has a normal brain, so tried to stay positive and think it's all relative

Not only i stayed there till 5am but i approached 5 girls in total, nothing special and they didn't flirt, still I'm probably the only one in the entire venue who cold approached 5 chicks

Saw the 17 yo who gave me her number 3 months ago, she was so sexy i was tempted to talk to her even if i know is a bad idea, because i live in such scarcity I also felt a bit inferior, she was dressed (or undressed) so sexy with her sexy friends while i look cool but all it would take for her is a date to find out i have nothing going on in life, i don't even own a car at 35

I had some rage for a few moments thinking all those girls fuck while i don't, knowing it's not rational because they are 19 yo while I'm 35, they will hit the wall at 27 while I'm still there like a vampire who always looks 23. Man are just superior, thats why I'm ignoring girls over 25 in first place. But the irrational part of the brain still activated and felt some anger while seeing some girls kissing. Also girls a stalked on Instagram gave bad looks and i didn't give a fuck, I'm so proud of this i used to a dancing monkey also worried about what girls think.

Now i think the priority is to really fuck any girl, even a fat one, it's been too much i don't touch a human female and i think man become very awkward when this happen, what do you think? I have about 4/5 pics who give me about 20/30 matches a week (only if i pay boost) the girls are i match are not super attractive and need game, but i might be able to fuck one if i keep boosting, what do you thinking?

Meanwhile looking for a better job to buy car and forniture and stop delivering pizza... One of the girls i approached was very good looking, she had a good reaction because we had eye contact before the approach, i don't think she's attracted, she just noticed a guy looking at her and when i approached was very sweet, i would've felt like shit telling her i deliver pizza for a living