I have this habit of opening up to people and not being capable of lying to them or concealing what I'm feeling. For instance, just a few weeks ago, I went through a breakup and you know the feelings of a post breakup and how bad they are when the breakup is still very recent. So I went to work and I was really mad and feeling down af and many of my coworkers felt that theres something wrong with me and I didnt really want to tell them what is going on or what happened. I didn't tell them exactly what happened but I just told them that I broke up with my girlfriend and some of them insisted to know more and I told them half of what happened because I didn't want to tell them what happened anws, and I just told them half of the story because I didn't know how to lie or how to push them off especially that we work together not just with each other if you know what I mean?
And theres that other thing which always happens to me and im so aware of it lol. Which is when I do something and im happy about it, I just go on sharing with everyone what I did or what happened. For instance, ever since I got into muay thai, I always like to share with my co workers what happened in my last class and what I did or what happened in general, or even when I sleep with a woman or whatever I do that makes me happy I just like sharing it with others and Im not even trying to impress them if that was my motive in the first place lol. And I fucking hate this shit.
And I also open up a lot or even when I'm going to do something crazy or whatever, I just like to tell people that I'm going to do X and X. I just like sharing with others and even try to make them smile as well if u know what I mean.
And the reason why im feeling this about myself which means why i hate this about myself is because I don't like being this guy who opens up a lot about himself or who likes to tell others like "hey im going to fuck this bitch next week" and etc... and im not saying im saying this to my co workers who arent close to me at least, no im telling these things to people who are close to me or are barely close but at least we sit and chat from time to time if u know what i mean.
What do you guys think about this? And how can I stop it? Because believe me I tried but I couldn't. And im the type of a person who is just too honest like if I feel youre a piece of shit i just go on and tell you youre a piece of shit. Its like i dont give a fuck at all and what i lastly said now is a good thing but in general sometimes openning up a lot can be a bad thing, which is being vulnerable and shit.
Vermillion-Rx Admin 2mo ago
It is extremely hard to diagnose you on a post man.
Sounds like you have terrible boundaries. Whether this is because of a clinical disorder or because of upbringing, no idea.
You need to have discipline and boundaries. It is impossible to diagnose what your problem is but regardless of what your problem is you need to control yourself. It's not even good strategy what you're doing.
Do you have any serious real friends that you can confide in or is every random person in your life the closest you have to a genuine friend? Not once in your post did you mention friends. If you don't have any actual friends then it would make sense that you're confiding in every rando and his pet monkey with stuff you shouldn't be saying to everyone and anyone
mattyanon Admin 2mo ago
Let them insist. You should not comply with this request. Say "I don't wanna talk about it man"..... if they keep asking, literally stay silent and say nothing. Do not be compelled to fall into their narrative of "you must talk about it".
Two things going on.
First is that you are definitely oversharing.
Second is that you are letting others rule you.
whytehorse2021 2mo ago
Let me know your score on this test: https://raadstest.com/
roguespa 2mo ago
I had a score of 106
whytehorse2021 2mo ago
Slight autism. I'm at 220. Anything over 80 is sus...
roguespa 2mo ago
Its not that bad tho right?
whytehorse2021 2mo ago
Not too bad. They break down the score into more categories so you can get a closer look at your deficits.
Musicgoon78 1 2mo ago
You can be honest. It's not what you say, but how you say it. Preface goes a long way?
"Would you like to hear what I'm doing tonight? I'm excited!"
You could be on the spectrum or have tourettes syndrome. Hating yourself doesn't get anywhere. That's a waste of time. Maybe see a therapist about your autism. In the meantime, tell the truth gently.
roguespa 2mo ago
Solid advice! Thanks man. But I don't think im on the spectrum, I mean maybe? Lol. How do I know tho?
Musicgoon78 1 2mo ago
It's not picking up on social cues.