Hi everyone,
Trying to get back in the game after 2 relationships and a few months of monk mode here. 26, currently fit and getting fitter, stable but very demanding job with good income.
I have a high body count and lots of experience with TRP. The problem is lack of social life and thus the inability meet new girls. Surely i'm not the only one who has been through this after uni. I do not drink. I go out for coffee with friends once or twice a week. What do I need to change? How do I get back in there?
Please don't say tinder. Thanks in advance.
Typo-MAGAshiv 2 1d ago
Do you ever leave your domicile?
Are there women at any of these places you go (besides work)?
Fucking talk to some of them.
Grocery stores. Walmart. Sidewalk. Fucking anywhere women are present, and you catch one looking your way and smiling or giving other IOIs.
randombjkdude 1d ago
Made the mistake of approaching at the gym. I now know why it’s a bad idea. Work is off limits as you said and frankly I don’t know how one talks to someone at a coffee shop.
Typo-MAGAshiv 2 1d ago
Here's where I think a lot of younger dudes go wrong, because this isn't talked about enough:
Try to gauge how open a woman is to being approached before approaching her.
A lot of guys will just cold-open on any woman they find attractive and do so without any regard to what she's doing. Then they wonder why they're getting rejected so much.
Caveat: almost no matter what, you are going to get rejected frequently. It's just part of being a man.
Look for IOIs, or Indicators Of Interest. Did she make eye contact and smile? Did she start preening when she caught you looking at her? If she does one or more of the many IOIs, she usually wants you to go talk to her.
Conversely, if she catches you looking, does she roll her eyes or worse, look disgusted? Does she immediately turn her back to you? Yeah, she's not interested. Don't waste your time or effort; you will be rejected.
In the middle of those two: has she not noticed you, but you want to talk to her anyway because she's pretty? Maybe she's in the middle of her set at the gym, or immersed in a book at the bus stop, or otherwise actively engaged so that she doesn't even notice you? YMMV, but I found it best not to bother with these either, as it's a total crapshoot. Frequently, they won't appreciate being interrupted.
Hope this helps. There are tons of other writings out there dating as far back as the late 1990s about how to gauge a strange woman's interest. Search around and read up on it, and start looking for them.
Vermillion-Rx Admin 1d ago
I think making female friends at the gym is fine. I knew s guy that was a master of gym approaches. he'd often be friend them and get recommended to "5 of their friends"
Musicgoon78 1 1d ago
The whole world is filled with women. More women than men. I can't understand how someone would want a specific place to meet women when you can simply turn your head in any public spot and see women everywhere.
I keep telling guys, just start talking to people. That's it.
EmpireCrimson 22h ago
Tinder! Sorry, that was too easy.
Go out more. You need move outside of your comfort zone and put yourself in places where you can meet women. Bookstores, cafes, Yoga class, it doesn't really matter.
Speaking of which, one of my go-to spots when I was a teen and in my early 20s was the "record store". I met and dated all sorts of interesting women. The internet killed that as nearly everyone uses some shitty service to download music. I collect records and occasionally when there are fairs where people sell vinyl I will still meet and interact with interesting people. My life has changed so there's no need for closing with an ask for a date or a phone number, but it still keeps my skills sharp.