I met someone in my industry this week through a friend who is well known to be top of his game and well sought after. I've heard about him from others and to be honest I was quite jealous when I met him. This guy was smart, was confident in everything regarding our industry and was just driven and hungry. My friend joked and said man how have you done so well, was your dad in finance like what drives you? This guy smirked and said no his father wasn't in finance, in fact, his father was absent and that's all the drive you need. It really got me thinking.

I asked a bit more about him afterwards, and my friend who knew him from post-grad at an ivy league institution said he was always a beast. He got straight 4.0 in every subject, topped his graduating class, scholarships from multiple institutions, poached by top tier firms before graduation. Said that he broke up with his GF because she was distracting him from his studies and apparently continuously rejected women. Said he was literally in the library or gym 24/7 learning everything upgrading himself, refused to party or go out cause he was so focused.

It got me thinking to the times in life when I was hyper-focused and driven, and each time it all stemmed from pain/embarrassment. In my 20's I started taking gym/mma hardcore seriously when I got friendzoned by a longterm crush. I worked my ass off to get my current position all because I failed class in high school and was embarrassed by my highly successful peers.

Now, I am quite successful, comfortable and no longer in pain. Girl rejects me, I don't care I've fucked plenty of hot girls. Buddy of mine does well, good for him I am doing awesome myself so I don't care.

But on the flip side, I am no longer driven. I can't seem to sustain this continual drive that certain people can like my mutual friend I talked about earlier. It's frustrating and I don't know what to do? There is more room for me to grow in my career and life but everything is just so comfortable there is no need to prove myself anymore....