Chick I talked to on dating app Feeld (the open relationship app) insist she wants to keep the conversation on the app until we meet in person. After I already told her to text me (amd giving her my #) and we already agreed to meet for a drink in 3 days. In my opinion, I was just going to Un-match because she’s trying to take control and it’s making me think she’ll flake. What would yall do? I already have a hot gf that knows what I do so I’m not that thirsty to meet up with her.
The nerve of her to say “I’m going to keep the messaging on here (Feeld) until we meet up”.
Or am I over thinking this and should I just say ok cool?
derdeutscher 1w ago
I dont think there exists a space in which you will keep a girlfriend past two dates.
Seriously, is this post a joke?
Chicks wants just to bang probably, and doesnt want fuckboys in her whatsapp chats, and besides with all this shit today I myself am not happy giving my number left and right. For women its only worse.
mattyanon Admin 2w ago
"ok cool".
She has her reasons for the lack of commitment, which are either:
Which is fine, her choice.
BUT
Her lack of commitment means low commitment from you......... don't go out of your way, meet her somewhere you are happy to be if she flakes, etc. etc. Zero effort date, reduce your expectations from her and reduce your commitments, emotions and expectations of her.
Lionsmane8 2w ago
You're over thinking it
Vermillion-Rx Admin 2w ago
Stop overthinking this. There are a fuck ton of obsessive creeps on apps. She's smart to stay on the app. Especially if the date doesn't go well. They know this from expecting, you clearly have minimal experience and don't understand women. Drop the fake alpha shtick as if she owes you before meeting you
Stop ruining it and just go on the date
This is why you spergs struggle to get laid and hang on to women you've fucked. Jesus
Nich2022 2w ago
You might be right in the overthinking. But the inexperience with women is wrong. Only reason I asked was because a woman that was truly interested never did that. They usually text right away or stop writing all together (in that case I unmatch).
I’ve never used the term Alpha in my life and don’t claim to be one… seems like a bit of projection bud.
I have never had an issue getting laid. Must be talking about other dudes on here.
Vermillion-Rx Admin 2w ago
Ah the classic projection line. Lmao you guys sometimes. How about I've read so many of these AskTRPs that I can spot it.
The problem, is you've never met this woman, and think you can achieve genuine desire over a screen. That's laughable.
Nich2022 2w ago
Bruh, You apparently never had women not give you resistance. From my experience they either stop writing or are highly interested and down to meet within a few days. Hence why I asked. I guess I asked the wrong person
Vermillion-Rx Admin 2w ago
Yeah dude this pretentious shit isn't going to get you very far on here. I have gotten resistance. And some of the ones that did ended up being the absolute best FWBs I've had who kept coming over non stop to the point they may as well have lived at my place.
I've conversely had girls give me zero resistance and immediately ghost me after good sex where they were very eager and it lasted hours and they were wet the entire night.
The problem is you absolutely have fake alpha perspective, regardless of what you want to call it. You think a woman (over a damn app screen no less) practically has to be wanting to suck your dick through the screen.
Get your head out of your ass. Eager matching on online dating is due to a multitude of factors, virtually none of which are genuine desire (wanting a rebound, being a whore, etc). She might really want to meet some matches over others but clearly you are giving her a reason to stay on the app anyway. She can smell how bad you want to get off it
Stop being autistically myopic and go on the date. Who cares if you don't have her number. Go on the date, you can't determine genuine interest from essentially zero vibe. You're not seeing the forest for the trees whatsoever
Nich2022 1w ago
She flaked. I simply said ok I understand. Her claim is because I didn’t say anything in the days between (2) so she made other plans.
Vermillion-Rx Admin 1w ago
All you had to do was go on the date. That's it. It was that simple
Nich2022 1w ago
I was planning to but she cancelled… I took all of your advice and just said Ok. Went on about my life for a couple days and the morning of she said she made other plans because She hadn’t heard from me..
Vermillion-Rx Admin 1w ago
Glad you finally considered our advice.
And correct, because she hadn't heard from you. That was why. Next time you encounter a girl who wants to go on a date just go on it.
If she shows up it doesn't matter if she has your number or not.
Nich2022 1w ago
believe there is a disconnect in communication which is my fault. I was going to go on the date but she canceled the morning of. Two days prior, after the advice here (me simply saying ok), I went on about my life, not thinking much of it. Then the day of the supposed date, she flaked (which I expected she would). How could I have done anything different or better? I’m missing something here.
Vermillion-Rx Admin 1w ago
Not have tried to get her off the app when you already had the date planned (going on a date IS getting off the app).
It was likely being pushy a couple times AND then going radio silent. She probably didn't like the vibe and it trended downwards in her mind after the conversation concluded
Or she lied and just matched with someone she thought she liked more that day. Either way it didn't help to push her to get off the app
Musicgoon78 2 2w ago
Really, your thought process is autistic. She agrees to a date and you're going to bitch out because you didn't get your way?
Stop being an ego faggot. Go meet this chick and and have a good time instead of larping some alpha shit.
Nich2022 2w ago
Nah not about alpha. I know flakey behavior. Your inexperience shows.
Vermillion-Rx Admin 2w ago
You're going to get banned real fast dude. You're accusing all of the experienced users of being inexperienced.
I have zero patience for this unhubble bitching on here
Nich2022 2w ago
You’ll ban me over this and I’ve seen way worse on here? I’ve been on here for 2 years. Whatever, dude. I have 0 incentive to be “alpha”. And don’t care that much. I ran into a situation i never been in and simply wanted some advice. But I get name called and threatened, ok.
Vermillion-Rx Admin 2w ago
No one is telling you to be alpha. How dense are you.
I don't care if you've been here two years, you're disrespecting multiple tags and being dense and pretentious as hell.
Yes, there is worse on here, FROM NOOBS. You on the other hand, think you know better than everyone else, so why ask your question if you're going to be a pretentious ass
redhawkes 2 2w ago
Don’t look for consensus. Consensus =! truth
Setup logistics and text here and there but not more than her. Bloopies text out of fear to not lose hoes, don’t do that. I can smell the flake but who cares, it’s a dating app. It’s a thirtsty chump circlejerk who pump up mid hoes egos.
It’s called a game for a reason.
Typo-MAGAshiv 2 2w ago
Her wish not to share phone numbers so soon seems reasonable to me. You're a stranger, and you two don't even know if you like each other yet. For all she knows, you're the creepy stalker type who is going to blow up her phone.
LOL. please tell me you're not butting heads with her and arguing over this. Here's how such conversations go when you're zen ZFG:
Anything else from you other than "OK" and dropping the matter is going to make you look bad.
As if having each other's phone numbers will prevent that.
News flash: women flaked even back before everyone had cell phones, let alone apps.
Yes.
Nich2022 1w ago
She flaked. I simply said ok I understand. Her claim is because I didn’t say anything in the days between (2) so she made other plans.
Lone_Ranger 2 2w ago
you are overthinking.
Personally - I would break away from 'texting / messaging' ASAP in favour of voice calls. when you are texting / messaging you are in their world - that is the woman's world. When you talk on the phone, you are in the mans world. Talking to someone on the phone, even for 3 minutes, you will be able to pick up on all sorts of non-verbal comms. Like if she is likely going to flake, or hit you with LMR.
I would simply say that you are a busy guy, and you don't have time to message people on apps (this SHOULD be true....if you have time to be messaging chicks endlessly, then you are not spending your time wisely).
If she point blank refuses to switch to voice, then you have your answer - she was going to flake and was just looking for text orbiters.
a woman that is interested will bend to your will.
Nich2022 1w ago
She flaked. I simply said ok I understand. Her claim is because I didn’t say anything in the days between (2) so she made other plans.
That’s why that last sentence hits. Should have knew this.
Lone_Ranger 2 1w ago
good man. Keep your chin up (as they say in UK).
You'll be fine. There really are plenty more fish in the sea.
As soon as you understand this (that there are millions of hot chicks out there) then your life gets better straight away.
Nich2022 2w ago
This is great advice. Thanks man. That last sentence is what I was getting at but I am overthinking it.
coolsocks00 1 2w ago
Your takeaway should not only be that you’re overthinking, but also that you’re ego investing in your frame. She didnt instantly enter your frame, so you see it as a lack of interest which riles you up; ”the nerve of her“.
This mentality only hurts your game. Having a high ego+confidence is good, women love that, but ego+“insecurity” is yuck. Very normal for dominant types who havent yet internalised indifference game/amused mastery.
What i would read from her reply is that she either has safety concerns (legit, smart) or she is dominant (ltr red flag). Either way the answer is to be unreactive.
Dont get into what i’d call dom/sub frames early. That is investment and she 1. hasnt earned it, and 2. isnt ready.
Vermillion-Rx Admin 2w ago
You have the vast majority of users telling you what you're doing wrong here, and you just plucked a single line from a single comment for your confirmation bias.
You got "consensus" to the contrary, but this is the only answer you regarded as good advice, because it was already the answer you wanted
Unreal. Absolutely narcissistic joke of a post
Nich2022 2w ago
“A woman that is interested will bend to your will” - which is my experience as I only date highly interested women. If I give my number and they aren’t interested they usually just stop responding - not say let’s stay on the app. The last time that happened many many years ago. It was a flake. So I wanted others opinion on this situation. I thought it was a community for men to seek advice, not get ridiculed. My bad
Vermillion-Rx Admin 2w ago
You only date highly interested women yet where are all of them in your life still?
your sarcastic lack of humility is why i keep shitting on you.
You're too myopic to bother with, you're wasting people's time on here. I'm not commenting on your posts any more
Nich2022 2w ago
Yes I have amazing gf. In which I still get to sleep with sluts, honestly. And some amazing FWBs. Calling me myopic doesn’t do anything man. Just came here for some new insights. Sorry my iq is not 140+ like yours. Just ban me man. Never knew this community was like this.
Vermillion-Rx Admin 2w ago
To which you all ignored. This community response is entirely because of your approach
First-light 2w ago
Just say "ok cool". What is there to lose? You want to dump in her pussy because she is a hoe not marry her.
It is possible that she may be a bit nervous, may want to make it easier to flake or may be a controlling type (quite a lot of women who keep a cuck are). But happily you don't want a relationship with her so who cares?