Some background: I‘m 22 years old, goodlooking, good style, high-status in the circles I frequent - I’ve taken the steps to increase SMV, however because I’m somehow psychologically fucked I have severe issues wrt closing the deal with women.
So this is my very first plate at 22, never done anything w women before. She doesn’t know I was a virgin before her & thinks I could bag almost any women I want lol.
Anyway it’s been 6 months, I told her in the beginning I don’t want LTR and she’s been chasing me ever since. Slowly escalated to the point where now we hang out 5x/week.
She says stuff like she loves me, she’d do anything for me etc. There’s only little drama and she’s hot enough that it sometimes feels surreal when we do foreplay. Plus she does whatever I want without complaining. She doesn’t pressure me about committing except crying sometimes.
I feel like I should be committing already because isn’t this what every man wants? Other men get nagged regularly by mid gf and don’t complain. On the other hand I feel insecure because this is literally my first girl and maybe I should try other girls before I commit. Thoughts?
No-Stress-Cat 13h ago
A wise man warned me once: Never marry your first piece.
I didn't heed his warning. I married my first piece.
She fucked me over pretty badly. Though I admit I was partly to blame.
Now, I want you to heed my warning:
.
NEVER MARRY YOUR FIRST PIECE.
.
That is all.
Dxmx99 1d ago
Like someone else said, Do what you want. Sit down, figure it out, get there by any means necessary.
Here's my opinion after reading your comments. I think you want an LTR with her. She took your virginity and you have a hard time dating. This leads me to believe you want an LTR by the very nature of your situation, but you read some publications here and applied a few things and now think you'll lose all alpha cred in this network if you get with her.
I think that, if you decide you'll stay with her, it would be beneficial to your life. You'll get LTR experience and figure things out as you go. Keep reading here, keep applying what you learn, keep fucking your girlfriend until the wheels fall off (metaphorically yet literally aka she wants to stop fucking you), and learn how to manage boundaries. Tip; you won't learn all of this in the first LTR.
That's my 2 cents.
EmpireCrimson 2d ago
WHAT DO YOU WANT??
If you don't want a LTR, then you need to see her less. That would give you time to get more plates. At which point you wouldn't care because you have other options.
medstudentgerman2002 2d ago
What do I want, that’s what I’m trying to figure out.
Maybe you’re right and it‘ll resolve itself as soon as I spin more plates. As I’m writing this I’m realizing though that’s not going to happen so easily, because I’m too comfortable in the current situation, and dating women is hard for me. I‘m basically de facto committing to this girl out of laziness.
wswZtyqNGQ 1d ago
+1 point for self-awareness.
+1000000 points for actually doing something about it.
AbusiveFather1 2d ago
So spin more plates and find out. This is not something you solve by induction, only experimentation.
MrSupreme 2d ago
You didn't clarify if you have fucked her yet,Since you.mention Foreplay i'll assume you have.
You dont have a bunch of experience, going out with her seems like it is just what you need. However there is a risk of developing Oneitis. You should keep gaming her wihout commiting.If you feel like oneitis is a risk then start spinning plates.
It sounds like she is enjoying tike together, a bit of lovebombing is what it feels like, dont get too attached to all.that affection.
EmpireCrimson 2d ago
He did - "She doesn’t know I was a virgin before her "
medstudentgerman2002 2d ago
I mean, that’s where I’m already at for like 4-5 months. Are you telling me this is where I should be, it doesn’t get better than this?
I I knew that this is as good as it gets, I could just chill and enjoy my time with her while focusing on my own goals. Not worry about other women. But I’m worried that I’m missing out & should date more women to find someone better
AbusiveFather1 2d ago
You absolutely should worry about other women. I was in the same spot: going to school, dating a girl that I know I shouldn’t commit to. It all came crashing down - not only did it affect my emotional state, but consequently my grades as well.
Spin more plates, good buddy. You must be in a position where her leaving you (which will happen) won’t affect you or your sex life
AbusiveFather1 2d ago
Nah
Honeymoon phase. Stop thinking with your corpus spongiosum.
First-light 2d ago
If you like her and enjoy the relationship, there is probably very little to lose by saying you are happy to be in an exclusive LTR with her. You are a student. Student relationships usually collapse. If you get bored and want more, then go find it. If you are happy and satisfied with her you will discover it by trying it out.
You have tried out the non committed thing. Try the committed thing. The funny thing about all this commitment is it all just depends how you feel (and even more how she feels). You are not cohabiting, you are not engaged, you are not married, you have no children. It lasts till it doesn't. You are faithful till you cheat (or till she does). It will be useful experience for you win or lose and I can't see a cost to you unless you give in to getting engaged. YOU need to explain marriage is not your thing but don't make a big thing of it, just slide it into a conversation once. Then if she brings it p "No, I told you so from the start. I am all about commitment and love but I don't believe in pieces of paper making lives better"
Musicgoon78 2 2d ago
No. I don't think committing to your first girl ever is a good idea. It sounds like oneitis. All girls will push for commitment when they like you and all girls will give you crazy sex if they find you high value. You didn't stumble into something rare.
It's your decision bro. Most young relationships don't last and the grass will start to look greener with other women around.
If your going to settle, your going to have to game her hard. This gets less enticing as comfort sets in.
mattyanon Admin 2d ago
No. Many men do not want this........
and that doesn't matter. What do YOU want?
Relationships suck sooner or later. Usually sooner, but eventually they go off sex and increase their demands. Multiple long term relationships or FWB is the answer.
Most men are betas, are unattractive to women and can't handle women - so they get exploited. Nagging is one symptom of that shit.
"Commit".
The whole notion is just fucked up.
Commitment, in womenese, means "be mine while I decide if I want to marry you or not, but don't leave me before I decide to leave you, and I'll probably go off sex soon, but do please keep the resources coming".
I mean.... sure..... try it. Go exclusive. You'll see what we mean.
Typo-MAGAshiv 2 2d ago
Well said.