First part https://www.forums.red/p/asktrp/323766/fr_potential_aw_put_her_asd_due_to_me_wanting_to_take_a_dum
I'll try to keep this one short. After coming back home she suggested that she will come to mine to sleepover. Yesterday we met, we were hugging talking kissing etc. Then I went to shower, she went after me. It was getting late so we were lying in bed, I started to kiss her, she was visibly enjoying it, I went down to her neck, she started moaning. We were lying side to side, so I put her on top of me, we kissed and I ordered her to remove the shirt. She did it and said "thanks, it's hot here". I went to unzip her bra and she said in laughing voice "uh uh" like a no. I thought she tries to dominate or something so went again, more firmly and she said "no, what are doing?". This kind of behaviour is ofputting to me because I would rather have fuck yes than to drag myself through the battlefield of shittests. She then leans back to my face smiling and says something like "are you feeling mogged?". At this point I lost all interest as my immersion was killed. She lays on top of me and I didn't really wanted to break through her jokes or asd I don't really know because honestly shits retarded at this point. I threw her of me and it was clear that there is not going to be any sex, in my mind I wanted her to leave but her bus was in 5h. I don't really remember how, but we started talking, she said she didn't want to have sex on 3rd date because sex for her is something most valuable she can give, she didn't want to get hurt because she saw condoms next to bed (they were hidden but somehow she found them) and when she was showering she saw shower gels that were used by obviously some woman. She said she didn't want to be my next bitch for fucking, that she feels so safe with me it's special and she was afraid that after sex I would stop being interested in her. I forgot most of the conversation but when we were lying trying to sleep she was so concerned she said she feels sick, she might cried at some point even. Before she was leaving she asked me if I still like her, and when she was leaving she asked if I could come to her this weekend. I said I will think about it as I want to sleep right now, she said "that explains everything". As we were standing close to doors we hugged and kissed and she left.
What the fuck is this situation? When we talked after second attempt I was just not giving s fuck about her but wanted more informations out of her to improve my future lays and I know she had boyfriends and one fwb, but none ons, and she told me they all were dating long time before having sex.
And also she seemed like she wanted to give me bj after hour of talking of the situation but I don't like pity sex so told her that my stomach aches (which was true but if not for the situation I would propably go for it).
Edit: she sent me some text, I google translated it so if you are curious you can check it out but sometimes it loses context https://imgur.com/a/n8RdrYE
Typo-MAGAshiv 2 1mo ago
1) more foreplay and more patience before storming straight to intercourse. You have to warm most women up a bit.
2)
She's turned you down on two separate occasions. Next.
Relevant: Wait for it? by Rollo Tomassi.
Musicgoon78 2 1mo ago
Shit test failed! Massively failed! You noticed how she smiled when she told you no? That was a sign that she wasn't serious. She wanted you to push back. Instead, you got incredibly butthurt and gave up instantly.
Your big problem is your frame. You come across as extremely weak and cowardly. How are you going to protect a chick when you can't even stand up to her tiny shit test?
You've got to stay consistent. This girl has given you ample opportunities to show her a strong confident side and you've failed at it
I'm sorry my guy, but you're not just going to be handed pussy. If you give up instantly with some small playful resistance, you're going to be single for the rest of your life.
Now let's talk about your "Battlefield of shittests". You mean one? One small one. Something anyone else would have shrugged off...
This girl bent over backwards for you. For some reason, she finds you valuable despite your submissive and cowardly ways.
She did nothing wrong or weird. She didn't fuck with you. You created this problem and kept it going. This is 100 percent your problem that you made.
Start over with another girl and stop being such an entitled princess. It's appalling.
redhawkes 2 1mo ago
Say it louder for the retards in the back.
mattyanon Admin 1mo ago
Yeah, agreed. 3rd date, laying in bed together, is NOT the time to pull out all that ASD shit.
Men have suffered through millenia of "make him wait while I fuck someone else". We're done with that shit - we have other options.
"Most valuable thing she can give" is what women say when they are selling themselves in exchange for financial resources.
Sadly "I don't want to get hurt" is female code for "I am not attracted enough to fuck you, I want this to be 100% derisked for me, I want to feel secure and I want you to provide all this for me". And any man who tries this finds out ....... it still isn't enough and she'll go right ahead and fuck someone else.
This is fucked up. You don't need this shit.
This is a woman PLAYING FOR COMMITMENT, and sadly when she gets it she will no longer value you or desire you.
All these rules and all this bullshit applies to you, it does not apply to another man who she was fucking, is fucking or will be fucking in the near future.
This is BETA BAIT.
Dude, you're young and this shit is probably new to you. I've been on the receiving end of all this emotional shit too. There is zero point wading through it all, you'll never come out the other side. It never ends.
At some point you gotta make it real simple in your own head....... "fuck me or fuck off". You don't have to articulate it in those words, but this needs to be your internal play book. You don't want to start to engage in all this shit....... because it is never ending.
Always ask yourself "does this girl want to fuck me or not". All that emotiono-drama, in your head, is simply "does not want to fuck me".
She is selling herself with sex in exchange for resources...... she has fucked this up in the past, but that isn't stopping her trying to resell her used virginity to you.
Time to move on dude....... time to move on. Next time move on a lot, lot faster and leave this trainwreck to someone else.
ogrilla99 1mo ago
Have to agree here. She says sex is the most valuable thing, etc but then her text messages say that she basically gave it up to "closed off guys" (note the multiple) and was surprised it didn't open them up.
What that means is that she was attracted to and readily fucked dudes she knew were not going to be LTRs. You think she gave them the same bullshit spiel about how sex is the most valuable thing she has?
If she's shocked that other women have been in your shower, it's because she didn't think of you as someone capable of having multiple women come to your home and bang you. I. E. She doesn't think of you as an alpha.
IMHO you should next this woman. That said in general, you need to understand that all of this stuff is a balance, and not either/or. That is, it's never "EITHER she fucks me savagely within 5 minutes of meeting her OR she'll never fuck me if I'm the last guy alive". Everything is a spectrum and it's up to you to decide how much effort you want to put into any specific woman.
I've had women who enthusiastically threw themselves at me, and some that I had to spend time gaming and getting through shit tests, etc. all were valuable and fun experiences because I decided how much effort a girl was worth.
Improving yourself with red pill principles will generally shift the scales and overall reduce the effort you need to put in, but it doesn't mean you can now expect that even Miss Universe will blow you on the street just because you're now so irresistible.
The trick is to not let any girl make you put in more effort than she's worth (to you). And then calmly move on if you're getting to that point without wasting further energy or getting butthurt about it.
Was this chick worth getting through her shit tests? Only you can answer that. But sometimes it is. Does she shit test every guy she fucks? Probably not. So maybe you should try to become the type of guy she doesn't shit test, but until you get there, only you can decide if dealing with them is worth it.
Tl;Dr if some mildly attractive girl that I was interested in as a slump buster was giving me any resistance rather than jumping on my dick right away, I'd toss her to the curb. But if Sydney Sweeney was topless in my bed I'd be fine dealing with a few shit tests to bang her (but I'd have my limits even with her and if she got near them I'd move on to some other chick).
Don't worry about if a bunch of Internet strangers call you alpha or beta or whatever. You decide how much effort a girl is worth and be prepared to move on calmly if she exceeds your patience.
mattyanon Admin 1mo ago
I've never had the experience where I push through days of resistance and shit tests and then it's been worth the effort.
Shit tests should be fleeting and after that it should be plain sailing...... and if not that, she knows where the door is.
Right...... and the question isn't "how do I make her believe this"....... it's simply a matter of having it straight in your own head. It's all much easier after that..... women sense what's true in your head.
ogrilla99 3w ago
I agree with this wholeheartedly. I found that the more successful I was with women, the less resistance I'd be willing to deal with. Both because you stop idolizing any specific woman as some sort of irreplaceable goddess, and also because if a woman wasnt interested there were plenty of others out there who were.
For example it took me a while to get to my current 3 date rule (either sex or very close to it within 3 dates or I'm moving on) but the truth is most of the time it doesn't take even that long, and if it does it's rarely worth it.
[deleted]
Typo-MAGAshiv 2 1mo ago
hey everyone! Let's literally rape a chick and spend years in prison!
(Do I really need the /s?)
What the fuck, dude.
Vermillion-Rx Admin 1mo ago
By technical definitions this is grape.
It is unlike you to post this stuff.
Read our content policy
@quassis2001 definitely don't take this advice
MrSupreme 1mo ago
Yeah i made it sound a bit harsh, thanks
Vermillion-Rx Admin 1mo ago
You're welcome
redhawkes 2 1mo ago
For all of you aspies
https://www.trp.red/p/whisper/1274
You have a half naked hoe on top of you and you're afraid to put your hand on her neck to amplify sexual tension lmaoo
Faint Heart Never Fucked Fair Lady
Vermillion-Rx Admin 1mo ago
The problem with the deleted post wasn't escalation it was specifically advice that was gonna land a guy on a coin toss of jail if the girl really wanted to and there would have been no legal defense to the accusation
First-light 1mo ago
That is a lot of text. You don't write all that text without being invested in someone to some extent. You also do not visit someone and take some of your clothes off in front of them unless you are serious about wanting something with them. But bear in mind she also talks of therapy. This is someone quite delicate who may not be secure in themself. She wants you but she is tired of getting feelings for guys who want a plate. You two don't sound like you have similar goals.
You can feign interest and if you feign interest enough, you will get sex -she has a record of putting out and getting hurt. This is what she is trying to tell you. She will probably make the same mistake again if encouraged and coaxed along. Sex will also come with quite a lot of emotional baggage if its only as a plate.
It sounds like you are not interested in the relationship she is looking for so it is unlikely to be a stress free experience even if you do bang her.