I'm happy with an older man. He was ready to start a family, settle down and retire in a time frame that worked better for my plans in life

My fiancé and I are 9 years apart. Men in my age group didn’t have their finances together. I make more than most men my age and have more savings/networth. I wanted someone on the same page as me and I couldn’t find anyone my age that was.

Other than that, someone ready to get married and have children. Another thing is what I call worldliness. I don’t want to be the smartest/ most life-experienced person responsible for making all the decisions and explaining why to my partner. I wanted someone smarter and more experienced than myself who I could rely on to be a true partner and leader. I can lead, but I’d rather not lead all the time.

When I was 25 I dated a 35 year old. I really enjoyed having a partner with more life experience then me. He wasn't stressed about all the less important things in life that previous partners (2 years older then me) had been. He was also an amazing Dad for his daughter and maintained a mature civil relationship with his daughters mother for the sole benefit of the daughter and it was great seeing this parent love for this child. But things ended terribly for me, and my lack of life experience (particularly the skill to understand other peoples motives/traits/emotional walls when they are different to my own) lead me to get hurt.

But I wouldn't necessary say age is a direct indication of life experience and people can go down different life experience journeys and end up in different places. My next romantic interest taught me that.

Took me 2.5 years to heal from this. Eventually I found interest in another guy 10 years older then me (so 27f & 37m now). Really kind guy who enjoyed doing things for other people expecting no reward. Kind of guy your grandmother would try setting you up with and most people who knew him didn't understand why he was single.

This relationship (we weren't intimate or dating, we did work together so saw 40 hours of each other a week) ended up being very emotionally abusive. He didn't mean to but it wasn't something he could magically stop doing. I ended up finding out about how childhood trauma can serverly affect a person's adult relationships. And I learnt my own people pleasing codepenantcy isn't healthy either.

Honestly I'm starting to think if a guy is mid 30s or older and not in a happy committed there may likely be a good solid reason for it. And they require MORE vetting to ensure their life experiences are compatible to your own. I'm sure there's a number who are fine and could guide a younger (mid 20s or younger) women on her own journey. But without the life experience it's hard for a younger women to vet the damaged ones from the good ones. I do think RPW ways will slightly help to do this compared to what's currently normal in Western society.

I'm a millennial (30s) and have always preferred gen x men (40s). They have a much more resilient and masculine approach to life, are less neurotic, and haven't grown up on porn lol.

I’m 23 and canNOT do guys my own age. They’re so emotionally stunted. My husband will be 30 in a few months. We’re both looking forward to settling down and building a life together with babies. We can bounce off ideas and have intellectual conversations

im 31 and my husband is 46. I met him when I was 26 and we got together almost immediately. My previous partners were all about 3-6 years older than me and this 15 years age gap is the largest i ever had.

He is successful, kind, wise and very charming. 5 years and 3 kids later, we are still very much in love and happy. :)

I’m in my 30s and was married to a man 3 years younger. He was very immature, feminin and emotionally all over the place. I’m now dating a man in his 40s (8 years older than me) and he is so much more masculine, grounded, strong, knows himself, in control of himself, knows what he wants, thoughtful, wise. It’s amazing!!

26f, 46m. Personally, I’ve been a more dominant person with past relationships but now I’m dating an older man and he’s so masculine and dominant he makes me really want to embrace my feminine/submissive side and it feels amazing! He knows how to treat a woman and has learned a lot from his past relationships. He really appreciates who I am and the fact that I can communicate my feelings, which no man has ever been able to handle due to their immaturity. His main goal is to have a family and take care of his woman. He’s established with his career, and confident in himself and what he wants/needs. Plus with how advanced he is in his career, he can be at home with the kids and spend a lot more time with me than someone my age. :) Never met a man like him before, especially not in my age range.

As a 23-year-old woman who would like to get married in the next few years and ideally have my first child before 30, I cannot date men my own age.

Most men in my city don’t seriously consider marriage and kids until their early-to-mid 30s (mayyyybe late 20s in some circles).

My BF is 30 and the relationship is going great. We share similar values and both would like to get married, buy a house and start a family within the next 5 years.

I simply don’t know any 23-year-old men who would be up for this timeline. Most are very early in their careers or still studying at university, still partying hard and hitting up the clubs/bars every weekend, and still travelling the world and “sowing their wild oats”. They aren’t ready to give me the type of commitment I need, and that’s okay! As men they don’t have the same pressures of a biological clock as we do and thus they can afford to take their time and settle down later.

More intellectual conversations. Much better dates.

I've been married over a decade and we are the same age. However, the older man thing felt like the guys mid life crisis. I suppose how much older would make a difference. Also if they have tendencies to exclusively go after younger. (Or much younger). Not all but some do so because women their age won't tolerate the shenanigans the younger gals will.

No drama, doesn't entertain women who flirt with him, doesn't use social media very much, has his priorities straight, knows how to communicate what he needs and wants, has a lot of patience, is more knowledgeable, responsible, knows how to take care of me, stands up for himself, doesn't take bs from anyone, solid in his career, good understanding of boundaries, etc. It's not impossible to find all of those qualities in a younger guy but it is harder.

I'm in my early twenties and he's in his mid thirties, for reference.

Late twenties dating a man 25 years older. He is so ambitious yet even-keeled - nothing fazes him. We have a lot of similar experiences so there’s a basis of understanding and mutual respect, but I just admire the hell out of him. It’s the first time I’ve looked to the man I’m dating as an example. He’s a wonderful father to two elementary-school-aged children. Still vetting him but if it works out I will not hesitate to start a family with him.

Age doesn't matter. It takes men longer to become successful. That's it. You can roll the dice on a 20yr old or wait at the finish line for a 35yr old. One is already a winner and the other is just starting the race. Winners have more options so be ready to compete harder for them.