“A man is known by the company he keeps.”
This ancient saying has stood the test of time, and for good reason. The people you surround yourself with aren’t just companions—they’re architects of your mindset, habits, and ultimately, your destiny.

The truth is simple: you rise or fall to the level of your association.


Why Association is a Superpower

Humans are naturally social beings. Our brains are wired to mirror those around us, whether consciously or not. This is why proximity to certain behaviours—whether productive or destructive—inevitably influences your own. Your closest associations are either an anchor holding you back or the wind propelling you forward.

  • Energy Alignment: Just as you feel drained after interacting with a negative person, you feel energised in the company of someone driven, ambitious, and confident.
  • Habit Formation: What your circle normalises becomes your default behaviour. If your friends waste time scrolling or complaining, you will too. If they prioritise fitness, discipline, and purpose, you’ll follow suit.

In the end, you are the average of the five people you spend the most time with. Choose wisely.


The Three Types of People

To take control of your life, you must evaluate those around you. There are three types of people in any man’s life:

  1. The Lifters:
    These are the people who inspire and elevate you. They challenge your thinking, hold you accountable, and push you to be better.

    • Example: A mentor who calls out your excuses and pushes you toward greatness.
  2. The Drifters:
    These people are neither good nor bad—they’re stagnant. While they won’t actively harm your progress, their complacency can subtly influence you to settle for mediocrity.

    • Example: Friends who don’t dream big or challenge the status quo.
  3. The Anchors:
    The most dangerous group. Anchors are actively negative and will drag you down to their level. Their mindset is riddled with excuses, envy, and blame.
    • Example: Someone who constantly criticises your growth, belittles your ambition, or encourages destructive habits.

How to Audit Your Circle

Your next step is to critically evaluate your relationships. Ask yourself:

  1. Do they inspire you or drain you?
  2. Do they align with the life you want to build?
  3. Do they hold you accountable to your higher self?

If someone consistently drains your energy, dismisses your goals, or steers you toward distractions, it’s time to distance yourself. This isn’t harsh—it’s necessary.


Rebuilding Your Circle

  1. Seek Out Lifters:
    Proactively build relationships with people who embody the traits you want. This might be joining a gym, networking with driven professionals, or connecting with mentors. Quality over quantity is key.

  2. Strengthen Your Boundaries:
    Anchors may be unavoidable in certain areas (family, coworkers). In these cases, establish firm boundaries. Guard your time and energy fiercely.

  3. Embrace Solitude:
    Until you find the right people, don’t fear being alone. Solitude allows you to recalibrate and develop self-reliance. Remember, it’s better to walk alone than in the wrong direction.

The Spiritual Layer of Association

In ancient teachings, association is called “sangha”, and it’s considered one of the most powerful forces shaping a man’s life. A wise man seeks uplifting company because association influences not just actions but consciousness itself.

  • Positive Sangha: Surround yourself with those who value discipline, honour, and purpose. Their energy will inspire your own.
  • Negative Sangha: Avoid toxic environments that foster envy, laziness, or self-indulgence. These associations pollute your mindset and erode your potential.

The Man Who Controls His Circle Controls His Future

Association is not just about who you spend time with—it’s about who you let shape your mind. Every interaction leaves an imprint, and over time, these imprints define who you become.

A man who surrounds himself with greatness will inevitably rise. A man who tolerates mediocrity will sink into it.


Action Step

For the next seven days, evaluate the conversations and energy within your circle:

  • Who leaves you drained?
  • Who challenges and inspires you?
  • What habits have you picked up from your associations?

Cut out the negative, embrace the positive, and take the first step toward shaping your destiny.

Your circle is your mirror. Choose wisely.