Not sure if this is entirely accurate. Some of the very submissive/feminine (ie HOT) girls will never text me first but will be very receptive after I text them. They are expecting me to lead in every way so waiting for them to text me for a meetup is disingenuous.

However, the same concept applies. I don’t text or push for a meet up too much and don’t act needy. I spread my time to a few plates at once to prevent this. When I feel like fucking one I hit her up which is once or maybe twice a week at most.

Neediness comes from your desire to have other people solve the problems you have that you dont want to face. If you want to get over it quickly you need to face that fear head on.

Neediness is the easiest way to get rid of a girl if you don't have the stomach to do it yourself.

Well, not all girls.

I am 35 and this is the #1 thing I would tell my younger self. I cringe when I think back to my texting and behavior in my 20's. I forget who said it but I love the quote 'women want to be taken on an adventure, they dont want to be your adventure'.

Relevant:

https://www.francoseduction.com/neediness-management-2/

It depends what you need and expressing it honeslty. I think we all need love and sex to some extent, but pulling on someones attention for validation is the selfish egoist side of needing which is just a little immature

What does it mean when a girl wants to hang out with you, even agrees to the time and place, and then when it gets within an hour of the event, she makes up some excuse saying she doesn't want to go? It happens to me so much. I usually stop talking to them because I figure they don't want to hang out. But it's so confusing. What am I doing wrong

This is exactly why Mark Manson centered Models around "non-neediness". He changed it to the vague and nebulous "true confidence", but changed it back to "non-neediness" by popular demand.

And on this line of thinking it's just as important to remember that the MOST important key to being attractive is NOT doing unattractive things. Doesn't matter how literally attractive you are if you keep doing UNATTRACTIVE things. ALL your upside can be wiped clean with one downside.

A workable plan is to have 3 plates. This is how you view them:

One coming in. One going out. One in the middle.

Plates do not last. They come and go. The harder you try to hold them, the easier they slip from your grasp.

Their order can change with any event by her, or any whim of your own. You may keep spinning a middle plate for months, while the other two are changing out with new women constantly.

For example, Crazy can be fun once in a while if you are careful, but she will usually go from incoming to outgoing rather quickly.

You spend time with each of them about once a week to 10 days. This gives you 3 dates a week with 3 different women; but you only see each one woman once per week, or less often.

This method helps reduce oneitis a lot. An Excel spreadsheet can help with logistics, pregnancy control, and to make sure you do not see one too often.

Neediness says, "I'm a fucking PUSSY who doesn't think I can do better than you"

that explains why i got stood up for a coffee date today after asking this girl 3 times until she finally agreed.

I know it's a reminder, but this subject was already discussed so many times. I thought you were going to bring up a new insight OP

Anw, thanks!

May we in 2018 be abundant in every aspect of our lives.

You can be needy if you're hot. A girl will simply interpret it as cute

A good reminder, neediness is never a good thing, ever, in any relationship (men or women).

A wild animal never feels sorry for itself.

Eh, unfortunately, if a girl is chasing you, there maybe something very wrong with her, as I've found out on several occasions. Initiating is NOT chasing. Chasing is repeated initiations after repeated signals of lack of interest. She doesn't reply to your text? Stop thinking about her for awhile and move on to someone else. Try again in a few months if at all. There are billions of girls on the planet; don't fixate on one. Easier said than done, as most of them are fugly, reducing the interesting pool to millions, or even hundreds of thousands depending on how high your standards are.

TRP has taught me to think that I am the boss. To never get attached to no woman. When I got some girl's number earlier this year, I did start texting her first (not everyday) whenever we talked. Sometimes she wouldn't reply but I always thought, if she fucks off, then she fucks off. If she's interested then maybe she'll hit me up first.

So I got busy with life and didn't text her for about 3 weeks. After those 3 weeks she does text first and even tells me that I forgot about her. I just said I was busy but didn't apologize(apologize for what).

About that texting first thing, I don't know if that'll always be true. Maybe some girls really want you to talk to you but want you to text first (as in my case)? But I do agree with the texting everyday part. Fuck that

You talk about girls like if they had a sixth sense.

Even for someone who is seasoned if you are focusing on one girl this can be hard to improve. This is why abundance is so important. By default you will be spread thin enough where you cant overinvest. If a woman flakes, you don't care. If a woman is slow to respond, you don't care. And you not caring, often makes her care.

The key is dont undervalue yourself and put the bitch on a pedestal. Value your time!

Thanks for this posting. We all have faced that neediness is the killer #1 for girls.

However, I think neediness is one of these nice guy behavior/traits. Thus: The underlying result of being not able to escalate and scared of rejection.

I’m particularly interested WHY this is the case for most men these days? I am also interested about any research that has been done (psychology).

This is real shit, neediness is a killer.. I use to be a needy cringe cunt too my ex, now I ghosted her I was always initiating contact making myself look like a fucking idiot.

No more dude, fuck everyone lol.

[deleted]

The last (almost) relationship I was in I totally ruined by being needy. She liked me, i don’t doubt that. She bailed on me a few times and the last time I calmly told her off. We talked it out and hung out a couple more times but i soon after got friend zoned. I was too invested, too needy. It’s an important lesson I won’t soon forget.

This is one of those things that autocorrect itself when you start exploring yourself, your hobbies, living interesting busy life. If you hanging out on reddit all day long, watching netflix as your hobby, well think again buddy!

Dude thank you for posting this. I could kinda feel the blue pill slipping in on a tentative plate (we'll see how next weekend plays out)/old crush and gotta remember that doing that needy kind of shit are the exact things that create orbiters.

I agree with not looking to desperate and not chasing her if she shows zero interest in you. However...a lot of girls just don't like to initiate contact, and they have so many options that they simply don't need to. Doesn't mean they don't like to talk to you and don't wish to be contacted by you. They're just not in love. They won't chase you. And if you refuse to text her first, you might end up missing a nice night of sex. Insisting has actually got me laid many, many times. I like to be clinical. I have a goal and i'll do whatever it takes to achieve it, even if it involves swalling my pride and contacting them first.

"The best thing to do when you find a girl you really like is to find five others."

Do you or anyone have a link to the video that RSDtyler says this? My frame is usually great but I have one of these weird crushes that I can't even explain.

One of the best trick I use regarding texting is to save the girl's number somewhere (like a peace of paper, a txt file etc) and then delete the number from my phone. This counter the urge to text her

This applies in most aspects of life. needy coworker, needy friend, needy family member. It’s just draining for others and an unpleasant characteristic.

Have a long term goal and drive and all the neediness will go away.

All the side effects of being driven and working towards long and short term goals are you what define a lot of redpill truths. Doesn't even need to be anything grand. We as men are built to test ideas, and our own limits. We are programmed to hunt; and modern day hunting is just that.

You won't be texting her incessantly because you are busy with life; your life that you've created and building upon.

A lot of BP guys that I've seen are also losers in life. They work mediocre jobs, play video games, and eat junk food daily. No shit a pretty girl is going to intimidate them, drive up their anxiety, cause them to be needy, and cause them to overprice the product. That's the scariest and most intimidating thing in their sad lives.

Yup. I trace back to the moment where my marriage went to shit and it when I failed a test in a spectacular fashion. She used to hound me about how I didn't need her. Eventually I got tired of it and literally started fabricating reasons why I needed her.

MISTAKE!

[deleted]

the more you need sex, the less you deserve it.

Be a fucking man and realize that the only person you need to focus on is yourself.

That's called selfishness. It's not a virtue and doesn't lead to a good life. There are plenty of things you should also focus on, and it's not like you can have a good relationship if you don't focus to your partner as well. You just must have balance with it and keep your head cool. You can't be the one who always makes the initiative, but that doesn't mean you can never do it.

That being said, you are completely right with the rest of your comment.

Chick I’ve been seeing missed our FaceTime session and I sent a message saying “ You tease” with a sad emoji.

face palm

I have a lot to learn.

Honestly speaking , tyler is one of my gurus . But what rsd ( tyler and nick) are doing with todd valentine and his new youtube channel is some of the worst impressions of rsd i've ever had .

Honestly, maybe my SMV isn't that high but I've NEVER had a girl initiate first. It is just my experience. Even when I went after 3s, 4s, 5s they wouldn't. Not saying it doesn't happen but I've always been under the impression you need to initiate because girls won't.

I'm incapable of ghosting and pussyfooting around with texting so I just un-added any women I found myself texting to often. If anyone else is having the problem I had, deleting them might be the best move.

100% of people are needy, just like 100% people are hungry - you just don't notice if they just met their needs.

You can make neediness as minimal as you want, but if you are the person that has nothing of value for the other you will never be asked out as much as Alpha Adam who is so fun to be around, always has an adventure or a great story to share.

Getting mad when she flakes or doesn't want to be with you She doesn't want to come out tonight? WHO FUCKING CARES?? Doesn't matter if she was your only option, your reaction should be "Alright have a good night!"

Disagree. Next this disrespectful bitch. Life is too short to be placing you energies in women who are only half interested. It's not on and by validating this bad behaviour you are only going to get it time and time again. Don't be a second choice. Be first choice or no choice - and use the energy of no choice to find those plates where you're first choice.