The feminist imperative is so strong, that men are turning against their instincts. Men forget who they are, they lie to themselves about what they want. So let's do something radical and different, let's be honest.
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As a guy, you want to have sex with the most attractive woman who will "let you". You are interested in a woman's surface more than her substance. A beautiful face and an incredible body will more than make up for serious flaws in character. On the other hand, an incredible, giving, and intelligent character is simply uninteresting on an ugly duckling.
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Men are dogs. While we can only love one woman at a time, we can and will have sex with multiple women, while remaining in love with the first. It is always the man who comes back, crying, seeking forgiveness for his infidelity, to the woman he loves. It is always the woman who comes back with divorce papers, she simply found someone better. No regrets.
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As men, we don't truly want to get into relationships, unless from a state of desperation or ignorance. A relationship is a protection of passion, but obligation can't overcome passion. Without passion, the relationship collapses or turns into "just friends". Most married couples already have one or the other partner in "the friend zone".
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We love women from the outside in, not from the inside out. Many delusional betas sincerely believe that what they love about their oneitis is deep and meaningful, that she just isn't like other girls in some unique way.
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Women are basically the same. The more experience you have with them, the more you're always waiting for "the woman" in a woman to come out. She sometimes arrives early, sometimes she arrives late, but she always comes.
- Our desire for sexually attractive women is deep, not shallow. A relationship with an HB9 will be more fulfilling and satisfying than a relationship with an HB6. The relationship with the HB6 will always imply a sacrifice, a bit of discontent deep inside the man, that at some level he has "missed out" on life.
These truths are simple and honest, but aren't common place for many reasons, the feminine imperative being the highest one. Truth is hard for betas, and it is harder the more beta you are. But as men we should prefer our truth no other way.
RcskaSedd 12y ago
this post was eye opening for a 22 year old who fresh in the world this kinda what i read right now from Roosh. http://www.rooshv.com/the-manipulated-man
pickup_sticks 12y ago
I think you're leaving ouf the difference between attraction and love. It's true that I want to bang every hot girl I see, but I also want fall in love with her. I've been in love multiple times and it's something I would like to find again (though I think I've reached a point where I don't need to find it).
I don't chase tail just for the tail. I only chase if I think there's at least, say, a 25% chance I could fall in love with her.
Edit to add: I do agree that there are some powerful biological drives behind male behavior, and that to pretend they don't exist is to lie to yourself. The next step after acknowledging them is to not shame them. They are not "good" or "bad." They just are.
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pickup_sticks 12y ago
I only read the first one but I absolutely disagree with it. He goes on about how women don't appreciate sacrifice. They absolutely do. But you have to communicate in a vulnerable yet non-needy way, and you also have to maintain boundaries.
That Xsplat guy... don't listen to anything he says. He is a misogynist who likes to rationalize bad behavior by arguing that women are basically just sheep that need to be herded. He thinks he has game when the reality is he's just a white guy living in Asia.
Source: me. I've been married and lived in Asia.
cron_nin 12y ago
Here's another idea. Marriage sucks, I realize that. But when it comes to marriage, I believe things can go from "passion" and just a sense of commitment to each other. Love could go away, yes and that's when divorce happens, but for intact marriages, it is a less passionate form of love. Almost like an intense friendship.
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cron_nin 12y ago
True, but here's something else. Think about all of the other things that she can lose from leaving her husband: income being cut in half, Having to take care of children; And what if the job she has doesn't keep up with the lifestyle that she's used to? What if she is a part of a religion that looks down on divorce, like Catholicism? And this applies to both male and female.
I understand that people are sexual beings, but we also have brains that keeps us from pouncing on anything that looks sexually gratifying.
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pickup_sticks 12y ago
A girl I recently dated had to pay alimony to her ex-husband. They are both college educated. In fact, they both have masters degrees. Difference is she works for a major consulting firm and he's a starving artist.
cron_nin 12y ago
This is the first that I've heard about people wanting to increase alimony and child support. With alimony, I thought once you get married again, your ex doesn't have to pay alimony. I don't want think that women are that conniving, trying to get 2 sets of income. And "child support" is usually set for the child. Most people forget about that point. Let's hope that she decides to spend the money on her child and not for her shopping habits.
You do bring up some pretty good points too. Makes me think a little bit more critically.
amazinguser 12y ago
I disagree with so much about this I don't even want to take the time to write it all out. I'll simply say I don't fit most of what you said and I really hope I'm not judged by that standard.
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amazinguser 12y ago
On the first bullet: a pretty wrapper is nice for about ten minutes. If I can't talk to a woman, I can't have a relationship with her. Sure I could get it up for sex, but that's not fulfilling. I crave companionship, not just a sex dummy.
Second and third bullets: I was faithful through my first marriage, she was a cheating bitch who I served with divorce papers. I'm now married again, have custody of my son from my first marriage, and am happy and content. I enjoy being a father and spending time with my family unit. I'm not brainwashed into it, I love it because it fills me with joy to love and be loved by them.
Fourth bullet: I actually mostly agree with this. I asked my wife out because I liked her boobs, and I've told her that on numerous occasions. I liked how she looked, but I love who she is. This brings me to number five.
Fifth Bullet: This is bullshit. This is sexism through and through, probably written by a guy who has been jaded by 'women.' Yes there are petty, low, hurtful women out there, but saying that every woman is that way is absolute bullshit.
Final point: I can't really disagree with the idea that if you think your partner is below you somehow then you will be dissatisfied. I think the problem there is the idea that you are better than she is. That's a mindset that will make you dissatisfied in all aspects of you life, though.
I guess I'm not familiar enough with the lingo to understand certain things, like HB# and 'beta', though from the context I think I can figure out what they are.
I don't put myself as a 'beta'. I'm born and raised in the country, taught to do for myself, earn my way, and break a nose and knock out teeth if it's necessary. I won't let anybody sit and fuck with me, but that doesn't mean I have to let everyone know I'm not going to let them fuck with me. Being your own man means being comfortable with who you are, being considerate of those around you, and demanding they have the same consideration for you. That's worked for me for thirty years, and I'm happy and satisfied with my life and my marriage.
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pickup_sticks 12y ago
Are you serious?! Last night. This describes practically all the women I sleep with.
amazinguser 12y ago
OP is making the argument that men don't crave companionship, at least men who aren't lying to themselves. I say that's not true, at least in my case.
To your point, I have stimulating conversation with attractive women fairly regularly. I work in a technical field, so women in the workplace are pretty rare, but my wife works in the theater and I've had some really interesting conversations with some of the (very) attractive women she works with.
My ex-wife claimed she was raped and when I found out she hadn't, she begged me to forgive her. I showed her the door. She spent weeks after that calling and knocking, trying to get me to reconsider. I was having none of it. She got into drugs not long after that. I got custody in the divorce because she was tripped out of her skull most of the next 18 months.
Of course I wouldn't make the case that physical attraction is unnecessary in a relationship. Every sexual being knows that it is, but if you hold yourself to a level that is unrealistic, you will forever be disappointed. And OP makes the sweeping generalization that physicality is the only thing important in a relationship. He insinuates it multiple times and straight states it in his first point.
Your last paragraph is gold. You are absolutely correct. Often the end is completely unexpected, but having been 'blindsided' once, I can look back and see the signs. I was running with blinders before, but my eyes are open with this one, and believe me, I look for things going wrong. Being happy isn't proof things are working, but genuinely enjoying time with your SO, and her doing that same with you (asking for it and reminding that it hasn't happened in a while, so you know she likes it) is pretty compelling evidence.
squarehouse 12y ago
Frankly, I don't think you're being honest to yourself here. What you're saying sounds like the things that we wish were true, these are the things that I believed about myself. I think most guys believe they are "enlightened" like this, that we're not "superficial".
But truth is, you would fall in love rather easily to a hot woman, even if she were unintelligent and shallow. The only thing that would stop this from happening is essentially our ego: If she wasn't reciprocating our interest, for instance, or if we think she's out of our league.
I think there's some miscommunication about the second and third bullets. By the second, I was just trying to say that men are essentially polygamous, we can have sex with multiple women without affecting our emotional bonds. I didn't mean to say that we always do...in fact, men tend to struggle to separate their feelings from their honor, and will go a long way to not cheat even if the opportunity came up.
By the fifth bullet, I didn't mean anything negative by it. It is "just the way it is". I'm referring more to female hypergamy, like how every woman wants a relationship and commitment, whereas it's rare for men to truly want this early on. Women want to know that you're going somewhere, bettering yourself, on your way to career and house. They are judging you, rather explicitly, on "how good you are".
So even if in the beginning it seems to be all about romance, and feelings of the heart, just know that it won't be too long in until the trap is set. She's setting you up to compete hypergamously for her.
Anyway, just in general about how literally you interpreted my words will cause me to reflect on how I write in the future.
pickup_sticks 12y ago
Seriously?! I mean, yeah, I'm totally comfortable with the idea that I will fuck a girl based purely on her looks. But I won't keep seeing her if there's not some substance there.
The most amazing sex I ever had was with a super smart woman, so smart she slightly intimidated me with her abstract reasoning ability. And she had a rocking body and amazing BJ skills. It's not mutually exclusive.
squarehouse 12y ago
I think you're debating strawmen, not me. The more attractive a woman is, the easier it is to fall in love with her. All things being equal, you'd prefer the more substantial woman to the less substantial, sure.
In terms of long term relationship potential, you're absolutely right. I'll sacrifice quite a bit of looks if she's just awesome, practical, down to earth, with a good head on her shoulders. When you're both in your 60's you're not going to care what she looked like when she was 22.
pickup_sticks 12y ago
Fine, we'll agree to disagree. My issue is that you were basically saying amazinguser is lying to himself about the relative importance of substance. Of course I wouldn't marry an ugly chick just because we're on the same emotional wavelength. But I wouldn't go the other way around either.
[deleted] 12y ago
I do not agree with these. Maybe many men are like this but certainly not all. Maybe this applies to about 50% of men. Not that anything is wrong with these men but they are not everyone.