If you know there’s many dudes out there interested in relationships, then why not date one?

Oh yeah. Because you deal exclusively with F boys, ghosters, and dudes who don’t give a damn if you’re alive the next day.

Then, ascribe your trauma to all men in general, and not your poor taste in men. Definitely the actions of an emotionally healthy woman.

Help me get past this feeling of discouragement

Nah, it's incurable, and will last the rest of your life no matter what "nice guys" tell you. It's that persistent, nagging doubt that you're a failure of a woman.

Your best bet is to spend the rest of your life warning younger, less experienced girls not to be like you or do anything you did. Most of them won't listen, but give it a try anyway.

I am legitimately scared of men

I think you're scared of yourself, because you can't understand why you keep choosing the exact men you claim to be scared of. You are scared that you are unlovable and scared of being alone. But as usual you blame "scary men" for your own mistakes.

Let me help you interpret this word salad of mouth noises.

She says: "I know there are good men out there"........"Having bad experiences"....."this is my past experience speaking"

She means: "I know there are good guys out there, but I know that they give me the dry panties. I have tried the bad guys, and they give me the damp panties. Why can't I have a good guy that gives me damp panties? There can't be anything wrong with me, and I'm not willing to even contemplate that possibility (why should I? I'm very pretty, emotionally mature and stable).

Modern women are unlike any other life form on planet earth. A cow or a horse quickly learns not to touch the electric fence. Even lichen learn that its better to situate yourself on the sunny side of the rock. Single celled life forms have great learning capacity than modern women.

Modern women are like a cow with learning difficulties. The retarded cow sees that there is a wooden fence, which is harmless to rub against. But it wants to run against the electric fence. It keeps rubbing against the electric fence, and keeps getting shocked. It KNOWS that the wooden fence is available, but it doesn't want the wooden fence. It wants the electric fence, but it wants the electric fence to not be electric. It keeps asking all the other cows about this, and posting long messages on CowReddit, asking about 'where are all the good electric fences gone'? It has been going to cow therapy for 8 years, at great expense. The cow therapist just tells the cow to 'be yourself' and 'value yourself for who you are a person'. The cow therapist tells the cow - "You just got to put yourself out there - never settle - keep looking for that special electric fence, its out there waiting for you'.

But the cow is getting old. She's been all over the farm. Tried every electric fence. Always the same result. She takes a break from electric fence rubbing, and she's going to try new fields in the spring. One day, she will meet her perfect electric fence.

She says that she is 'scared of men' but she doesn't elaborate. I think what she is scared of is the truth.

The truth is that she is only attracted to men that treat her like shit.

I'm old now. I'm early 50s. I was born in a Femocracy, I grew up beta, and I've been blue pill. And I am a 'learning organism'. By that I mean, I respond to the environment around me. What I learnt is that 'nice guys' don't get the girls. Assholes get the girls. So I became an asshole, and I got all the pussy I could handle.

If she (and other women) want to know why 'all men are assholes', its because of the incentive structure that women have created: If we treat you with contempt and disdain, you let us smash. If we treat you with respect and admiration, you might let us be friends, as long as serve you.

Her taste in men is trash. Most men are good guys, so any woman whose entire dating experience is with unsuitable men is simply attracted to such men. She is actively selecting for toxic men and actively screening out the kind of men she says she wants. Even if those men are not approaching her (guys know the pitfalls of expressing interest in women who are not giving off strong IOIs), she could be approaching them. It’s not like regular guys get approached very often, so her chances of success are extremely good.

That makes her claim of being emotionally mature suspect. Women who are emotionally mature and stable don’t spend their entire adult lives pushing away good men and chasing players and BadBois.

Obviously her “education” didn’t make her any smarter when it comes to relationships. Although that may have contributed to her “success” (I’ll need to see her balance sheet before I sign off on that, by the way), it probably works against her because 1) boss bitches are not feminine like good men want, and 2) it sends her hypergamy into overdrive because women who are “educated and successful” look down on men who don’t possess even better versions of those credentials. (The fact that having a degree doesn’t correlate with being educated is probably something she doesn’t understand, either.)

It’s also telling that she doesn’t say anything about her appearance. Women who are attractive (or who think they are) tend to lead with that. Being pretty is supposed to be enough to get what she wants because pretty privilege is a thing. The fact that she doesn’t list “being pretty” as one of her amazing traits strongly suggests that she’s fat.

"I need some encouragement here. After discovering my RMV was way way less than my SMV, both in person and on OLD, I just want to hide from reality. I just want someone at my SMV to act like someone at my RMV."

"I need some encouragement here"

Sorry all out, especially as concerns dating and "dating". Certainly don't have any for someone who very likely coasted by and had it easy when young - since I suspect you having problems with OLD results is a new thing for you.

Here's a crazy idea - how about incentivising those looking for a relationship and quickly give them some of what you're giving your hook ups. If you're actually very emotionally mature and stable, should find someone do date that might turn into a relationship fairly quickly. Here's a hint - the good guys want to get enthusiastically laid also ... shocker. If the beginning is more like a job interview and a job in itself, who the hell wants that? I'm sure even with all your serious as a heart attack goals you want "fun" while dating someone; men want their own brand of what is "fun" - being judged and pressured into a relationship way to early on isn't it.

Also, you have to build a relationship and do actual work to get to that stage. It doesn't fall fully formed into your lap. If pussy is all you are offering, that's all they will be taking. Being "educated and successful" doesn't help you; it likely severely limits who you'll accept you since you'll now want someone even more educated and successful.

As far as your maturity and stability here's a relevant quote from the psychiatrists in a Duckman episode "... we find you more poorly adjusted than James Dean's brake linings"