Dedicated to exposing all the women who complain about wanting a "good man", to show women's poor dating behavior and unreasonable standards while offering little to no value themselves.
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First-light Jr. Hamster Analyst 1y ago
Get a cat.
I think the reason they all end up with cats is that cat's just don't give a shit. The cat takes her as she is with distain and she feeds it anyway.
Seagram7 Jr. Hamster Analyst 1y ago
The word "bitch" has been used so much that it lost it's emotional meaning. Plus strong independent women have even embraced the word "bitch" to mean strong and powerful.
I have this coworker that thinks being strong and being a "bitch" is the same thing. Of course no one, to include her fellow female coworkers like her. Anyway I share a desk with a female coworker that likes to keep me up on the office politics. She said that the strong independent women was asking her and a few other women why no man wants to work with her. "Is it because I am a strong independent women that is intimidated by a self assured equal?" The reply was that no one likes you because you are just plain "mean." You are just a mean person. That word is what affected her. Not the word bitch but the word mean.
A certain word or phrase is what the OP needs. Something that will hold a mirror up to her and let her see herself the way others see her.
polishknight WAATGM Endorsed 1y ago
I'm reminded of the wonderful line from Dead Poet's Society: "So avoid using the word ‘very’ because it’s lazy. A man is not very tired, he is exhausted. Don’t use very sad, use morose. Language was invented for one reason, boys - to woo women - and, in that endeavor, laziness will not do. It also won’t do in your essays.”
It's interesting how she didn't associate words such as "intimidate" with "mean". Perhaps because she had defined the word "bitch" like some "assholes" do as "go getters who get a job done" or "someone who doesn't put up with nonsense from others" which can be construed as positive traits.
An old-school friend of mine from Switzerland WWII era told me 35 years ago: "American women are ambishhhious". I had thought in my naivety back then that this meant they were "go getters" but what she meant was she thought they were bitches. I figured it out soon enough.
Lone_Ranger Sr. Hamster Analyst 1y ago
This is an interesting sub-thread.
I agree that the word bitch has lost its meaning, esp now that women equate it with being 'kick ass'. Women really do (honestly) think that men are 'intimidated' by them, which I find unbelievable.
If you are discussing this with a woman, you should try substituting 'bitch' with 'manly'. So, you could explain
'Men don't like Janet, because she is too manly. They are not intimidated by her, they just find her unattractive.'
That is exactly both the truth and something that women can understand. They know that they are not attracted to feminine men, so they will sort of understand that men are not attracted to masculine women. And it will give them the fear. The one thing that straight women are still afraid of is being seen as 'manly' - that is why the spend their entire life savings on things like make up and laser hair removal and waxing etc.
They are not afraid of the 'bitch' label, but they are still afraid of the manly label.
polishknight WAATGM Endorsed 1y ago
You're giving them too much credit. Most of these women don't see the double standard on their own much less when it's pointed out to them since they define these words in opposite context. For example: A woman whose screaming at everyone around her to do as she says is being "strong" and "assertive" like an alpha male. A man who suggests to her that she could try something different after she complains about it for 10 minutes is "mansplaining".
A "feminine" woman is one who sits around waiting for men to "lead" by doing what she wants without her telling him and paying for things. A man who lets her do the planning or pay for things is a beta male bum.
Get it?
That being said, there are intimidating women my wife being one of them where she goes into harpy mode and my daughter calls her on it: "Be nice!" I point out to my wife there are moments when you have to "intimidating" such as with pushy salespeople but she goes into wimp mode and goes along because she doesn't want to stand up to anyone outside of her comfort zone. My daughter and I are family, so my wife feels empowered to be "intimidating".
Funny story: When I knew I was on the next layoff list I had a fun "to heck with it" attitude and attended (as was my right) the "women in tech" program at my job. I went in and grabbed a huge cup of diet coke and 3 slices of the cheapest pizza I saw in my life and the women who came in were so amazingly meek and servile. It was as if they hadn't left the kitchen in their lives. Perhaps they LIKE to think of themselves as "intimidating" but in reality the guy just wasn't feeling them like a man whose rejected saying: "I suppose she couldn't handle my sense of humor".
Lone_Ranger Sr. Hamster Analyst 1y ago
You missed a trick there Polish....when you realised you were on the 'kill list' you should have gone to HR and complained that the company was not being supportive about your transition, and asked them to formally lodge a complaint about you being discriminated because of your gender identity. Then when you got fired, you could have played that card. The company would be far too chicken to argue that in court.
polishknight WAATGM Endorsed 1y ago
That didn't apply to the situation (long story).
Interesting thing about her: I had befriended her and invited her to our housewarming party and such and often was her confidant and I had a (polite) disagreement with her about a project I was running she tried to micromanage. She then snitched to our manager about it and he knew she could be contentious and knew I meant well. Here's the thing: If someone is your work friend, you don't snitch on them. You perhaps wait a week and have a nice chat about it later. I always remained guarded with her and now I'm glad I did.
Generally, Eastern European women can be useful confidants (when vetted of course) along with European and Eastern European men, even many African and South American men. Most East/SouthEast Asian men as well. There's a sort of code they have where we can have confidential conversations.
Yes, feminism is most of the problem but we live in a low trust society at this point and it can be isolating at times. It helps that I realize what's going on which helps because if I didn't, it would feel suffocating.
NotaBene Sr. Hamster Analyst 1y ago
If you were actually smart, you'd realize how dumb you are.
"Dumbing it down" for a woman just means "talking less" and yes, that is attractive. Then you opened your mouth and showed how ugly you really are.
You're a prideful, stuck up woman who was told she was "smart" too many times. You will never find a man that meets your standards of "equal or better" (whatever that means), and the more men you sleep with, the higher your standards will go and the more beautiful you will think you are.
houseoftolstoy Unchivalrous Christian 1y ago
I am going to call BS on the reason men are offput by this woman is due to them being "emasculated." No, I would argue that it is due to her abrasive attitude and lack of feminity that is causing men to opt out of any further relationship. What she fails to realize is that her "ambitions" stand in conflict with any feminine traits she claims to have (such as making meals from scratch and giving back rubs), so to her it may appear that her that it is her ambition that turns men off. No, it is you being too full of yourself that makes you become man repellant.
And there is way too much emphasis on "emasculation" in her idea about why men do not want her. The source of emasculation is not a "successful" woman for the vast majority of cases, but rather when a man understands the underlying threat of force holding him back from being able to express any masculine traits. I am more referring to the government, as men are frequently given the short end of the stick when it comes to divorce/family court, hiring practices with enforced quotas stacked against men, and the lopsided treatment of men by the justice system (such as with the Duluth model that automatically has the man arrested). It is not the woman doing the emasculation, but rather her thinking that she is really "doing it all" herself without realizing that in many cases she is being propped up. This can apply not only to government force, but media portrayals too (and I will not get into that as I am already tangeanting too much).
This all is very similar to the "men are intimidated" charge, which is also false. Sometimes a woman is just too much of a bitch, and that is the actual reason men are repulsed.
polishknight WAATGM Endorsed 1y ago
What's fascinating about this diatribe is how it starts out. Take away the first sentence from the first paragraph and read the rest on its own and it sounds as if she's sympathetic and empathic.
"Society forces men to earn their manhood, thus everything becomes emasculating. Even sucking from a straw can make a man less of a man. Having a small dog, etc. Life must be difficult when your masculinity is constantly being threatened"
But then she later says: "You are a man thus society allows and even encourages you to have those traits".
This contradicts entirely what her first paragraph said. If society "allowed" only men to be masculine and encouraged it, then these men (particularly the successful ones) wouldn't be so weak and fragile. Society would cut us breaks "boys will be boys".
Look at this woman whose the epitome of the toxic, fragile masculinity she mocks: She's argumentative, hostile, and craves external validation in the form of successful men on her arm. She attempts to justify her "goddess" femininity by bragging like some catcalling construction worker: "I can cook meals from scratch, give backrubs and fetch beers!"
But so what? Those minor feminine traits she claims to have are meaningless in the initial attractive portion of a relationship. You can't see backrubs on a dating profile and she's going to be mooching beers from a man on a date, not fetching them.
One aging career woman craving to become a trad-wife tried that on me: "If you provide for me a big home and let me quit my job, I'll make it all up to you LATER!" They want everything NOW, we're supposed to wait, and oh, the court system let's them walk away with fun and prizes. "I'll gladly pay you Tuesday for a hamburger today."
And heck, when she screams in anger that she might have to "tone things down", she fails to consider that's one of the defining traits of masculinity:
"The strong, silent type".
Impressive-Cricket-8 Founding member of FapGPT 1y ago
Wait for it...
And there it is. Didn't even have to wait that long.
Random_Throwaway_000 1y ago
They always say equal or better, but I know the equal is just virtue signalling. They want better, otherwise they say "close to me". If we made equal then she got a raise, is she leaving me? Ya, so equal is BS. Better only lol
polishknight WAATGM Endorsed 1y ago
Note that she defines herself as, quote, "mind blowing, sexy, stunning, gorgeous, beautiful goddess feminine in every form; mind, body, and soul" So consider what kind of man she thinks is "equal" to her.
When women such as this say they had to suppress their "smartness" for "insecure" men, what they mean is that they attempted for a brief time to not criticize him or argue with him over every little thing he doesn't care about BEFORE the waitress arrived to ask if they had a drink order. She has to "play dumb" and keep her mouth shut and perhaps talk about nice things like STUPID people.
Prior to the dating apps, back in "the before times", before internet, I knew dozens of aging women like this who simply had no personal contact with men whatsoever. Nobody asked them out at work and their Resting Bitch Face meant that nobody chatted them up at the supermarket checkout line or coffee shop either. It didn't motivate them to make an effort to change, but at least they didn't consider themselves goddesses like today because they got 100 swipes from horny guys.
Mundane_Worldliness7 Sr. Hamster Analyst 1y ago
Yeah, if her description is correct, she is a 10. If she is a 10, she’d have had her pick of guys who were 10s and who didn’t fear her alleged intellect.
GimmeTheUsual Sr. Hamster Analyst 1y ago
That definition made me chuckle too. As others have said, if she was so great -- then where is her man?
Miss "I don't gotta change for nobody" isn't intimidating anyone, she's just being insufferable and men are smart enough to dash away after the first sexual encounter.
I'd love to see dating apps (Really "find a fuck" apps for most women) just wipe out and fail, but the hungry female validation machine won't allow it.
Vermillion-Rx Penchant for plastic dolls 1y ago
How many women would NOT have this problem if they had spent their youth toning their stomach and picking up feminine behaviors and hobbies instead of climbing the corporate ladder
They price themselves out of the market, not because their prospects are less valuable, but because their ego is too high. Would a woman making 40k in a low stress and happy work/life balanced job hate her dating pool? No. Probably not.
She'd probably be more than fine with all the blue collar guys who are in good shape, have good values and masculine attitudes instead of fighting over Chadbux and his harem at the upper echelons of status.
Would bet money most of the men they chase are actually far higher than their earnings because at a certain point of status these women think they deserve the world and the stars, too. She makes $40k and is fine with a man making 60k at his trade. She makes "six figures" and now suddenly she needs a man who makes 300k or 7 figures.
The higher they climb up the status ladder the bigger and more demanding their criteria becomes. They look around and not many other women are making 100k so they hike their demands even higher than mid-status women while the feminine Hooters waitress with a good attitude making paycheck-to-paycheck tips from patrons would be more enjoyable to spend time around and has more of her head down to earth than Corporate Carol and her 3 degrees and debt she's still paying off.
GimmeTheUsual Sr. Hamster Analyst 1y ago
"Hoe Math" describes this dynamic well, from the "I need a higher earner than me" from women, while simultaneously wanting "equality" and begging the govt to make it happen, which then makes it even harder for women to find that higher earner. Its insane.
wswZtyqNGQ 1y ago
The sublime comedy in all of this is that the feminine waitress has the intellect to understand this situation while the N + 1 college degrees Corporate Carol doesn't. College degrees are the new lottery tickets, in that they're a tax on stupid people.
polishknight WAATGM Endorsed 1y ago
I'm chuckling. The lotteries are up to 1/2 billion at this time so I bought a ticket. Granted, it's still a ripoff but it's less of a ripoff when the payoff is only 5 million.
It feels good to pay a "tax" that I may be a multimillionaire. I don't check the numbers for a week. It's sort of like swimming in an ocean during shark season thinking you could get eaten but instead, I could be a winner. Or walking around in a lightning storm but the opposite.
That being said, the women I talked to have incredible magical thinking going on: They either think they're going to be the "lucky ones" to get alpha chad because she's demanding and alpha chads are into that (a few women got lucky, look at who Prince Harry married!) or they think they're going to die if they get on a roller coaster. As Barbie says: "Math class is tough".
Lone_Ranger Sr. Hamster Analyst 1y ago
"I have been called mind blowing, sexy, stunning, gorgeous, beautiful.... etc etc etc"
This woman needs someone to sit her down and explain. When a man in trying to get in a womans vag, we will say all sort of compliments. None of them mean anything. The very next night, we are saying it to someone else.
A guy says you're beautiful? Means nothing. Nothing. Talk is cheap. Most times, that's all it takes for women to give up the poon. We talk, you drop your drawers, its all good.
Just please don't go around thinking that it means you're some kind of goddess.
polishknight WAATGM Endorsed 1y ago
Better yet, if she's so smart and a goddess, why doesn't she have the man she wants? She says she can "wait" for him, but couldn't a "dumb" woman do that? If a man said he was hot and smart, there would be zero excuse for us not having the woman we want unless such a woman doesn't exist which then says the standards are literally unrealistic.
Lone_Ranger Sr. Hamster Analyst 1y ago
I often hear this from women, they say they are going to wait or its worth waiting etc or they say they are going to take a break from relationships / dating and come back to it later.
None of them seem to realise that every week that passes means that their value is declining. I bet the woman who wrote that post is over 30 and single. She has nothing to gain from 'waiting' and everything to lose. I don't think most of them realise, waiting is not the tool that they should be reaching for. Time is not on their side.
polishknight WAATGM Endorsed 1y ago
Sometimes, women have taken breaks and actually made positive growth (or so they believe) such as going to therapy to deal with daddy issues or getting their finances in order (such as paying off student debt). It may be frustrating for them to realize that they really have made progress and go back to the dating market and find it has changed particularly if they cross the 30 y/o threshold and the cruel metrics of the dating apps treat them the same as a 6 foot guy who lists himself as 5'11" instead.
Not only that, they often improve themselves not to be more worthy of the men they desire at that moment, but rather then increase their demands due to their effort similar to someone who thinks they can list a home at 120K more because they did 100K of kitchen renovations (No, I'm NOT making that up!)
It astonishes me at how few parents educate their daughters about their biological clock. One of our friends had her parents at a dinner and she's 26 and going to law school until she's 30 and then maybe she'll bag a lawyer, yes? Her parents said nothing as I was thinking she's both pricing herself out of the market AND frittering away her youth.
hornetsfalcons12 Sr. Hamster Analyst 1y ago
From the same woman who will say something like
She’s going to ask for a whole host of different attributes, and for him to behave in a certain way. But he shouldn’t make any sort of demands out of her.
I’ll put it this way, if he’s just a better version of what she offers, then what does he get for his relationship effort that he couldn’t get by paying for it?
polishknight WAATGM Endorsed 1y ago
The key tell here, actually, is her statement she's going to "wait". By "waiting", she doesn't risk rejection. She doesn't hear SHE'S not good enough and, therefore, isn't a goddess and will have to change something about herself. She's perfect JUST AS SHE IS and wants to be "authentic" and the right man should stumble across her like out of a romantic comedy.
Logic 101: If she's so pretty, smart and ambitchous then she shouldn't have to wait. She certainly doesn't wait for any liberation in the workplace, yes? She could walk right up to the perfect man and ask him out and being so perfect, why would he reject her and if he's an "insecure" man, then the rejection shouldn't hurt, yes?